Greenville's free alternative weekly

5/24/06 LTR’s

In this archive one of the FPA board members that benefits from the organization defends it…there’s a suprise. These “Talkbacks” were included in the LTR’s for a while before we created a seperate category. After all the whole point of Letters to The Reader is that we write letters to you!

Dear drunken phone call: The transcription makes it lose some of the sarcasm, so we’ve added a feature where you can listen to calls on our website. This was the best one all week: “Hey there fella, I was calling to congratulate the City Paper on ah, bringing down the Three Rivers Festival. After all I know it was you that did it. And tell your mom that I agree with her; you are completely tasteless. Bye.” Don’t worry. We’re sure you’ll be able to catch Styx at the State Fair soon (for a fraction of the price). Columbia City Paper

Dear Lightweight in so many ways, You might remember me; you kicked in the bathroom door and called me gay for washing my hands. “I remember my first beer,” I’d said and you both stood there speechless. A few minutes later, I was eating pizza in the dining area and your pubescent punk ass came up, smacked me from behind, and then ran out the door. I’d say you slapped like a girl, but it actually hurt when a girl hit me. Point is, if Pop’s Pizza were allowed to sell beer, a bouncer probably would have stopped you when you ran out the door. A small fry like you that has to slap from behind could use a good bouncer ass kicking to put some hair on your balls and teach you to act like a man. Tell you what; I’m a good sport. You’ve now had three or four weeks to come up with a good comeback. I’ll meet you in the Wachovia parking lot at 10pm Thursday, June 1st and we’ll see how good it is. Otherwise, I’ll just assume that you checked into AA or had a date with your boyfriend. Columbia City Paper

Dear Ted Rall: I think it is wonderful that we live in a country where you can call the President of the United States insane, and fear no recourse. That is not typical of many other countries. I also think it is extremely disrespectful and crude. Debate on substance, which you sort of do, selectively, but the President is hardly insane. If I was to follow your lead, I would call you a bitter, pessimistic sore looser [sic], but what would that accomplish? I know it was more comfortable for you to live in a world where bj’s were more important than dealing with Iran, but we can only overlook the fanaticism of the Middle East for so long. The time has come to deal with it, or it will be too late. Has everything been done the best it could have been, probably not, and that is common across government. However, the president won the right to execute his policy, twice. I know you think he lost, but he didn’t. The buck stops with him, these are his decisions, and you have the right to write whatever you want in a free city wide paper, just like he has the right to bomb the hell out of Iran. I am not trying to convince you of anything, but cheer up, the world, this country, and your life are not that miserable, I hope. Chris Broderick Columbia, S.C.

Dear Editor: 18 merchants out of over 200 feel the [Five Points] association is not representing them. Did they make their concerns known to our executive director or their board members before deciding to form another association? No. They say they feel the Five Points Association has failed to be inclusive, yet I learned about their first meeting only after it took place and have never been asked to attend any of their meetings. How do they decide whom to include? As far as daytime merchants not being represented on our board, our association’s board of directors consists of 12 members, all of whom are voted into office by the members of the association. Our board is currently comprised of: 1 property owner 1 attorney & property owner 4 retailers 6 hospitality owners All nominees have to consent to have their name on the ballot and many feel they do not have the time to serve. There were several retailers asked to run in the last election and only one accepted. Since the membership votes them “in”, we have no control over the board’s make up, thus hospitality heavy board is not something we have control over. Anyone that has a vested interest in our business area may join and run. This includes neighborhood residents and employees of businesses. If merchants are unhappy with the board’s members, then all one has to do is join the association and ask to be nominated. Get out and campaign, get elected and have your voice heard. Dennis Hilter is referred to in your article as a bar and restaurant owner, yet his businesses are primarily retail and he is one of the strongest advocates we have in decisions affecting retailers, such as appearing before the zoning board when a retail space wants to become hospitality. I can also assure you the decision to place meters in the area was made by the city and not Mr. Hiltner. As far as the petition Randy Dennis wanted to present to city council: If only 10% of the area merchants signed a petition against meters, would it have carried any weight? There is no secrecy about anythingall board meetings are open to anyone that may want to attend. Furthermore, anyone, whether they are a member or not, may ask for any information re the association. As far as the construction taking longer than necessary, there have been many “surprises” once areas were dug up. Plans then have to be altered. Some of our underground systems were so old they weren’t even in the city’s drawings. I’m surprised these guys didn’t throw up their hands in frustration and walk away from the project. I don’t understand why parking meters and nighttime customers are causing daytime businesses to suffer. My sales were up for 2005, even though we had construction directly in front of our business for over 90 days. The new meters did not prevent us from just having our best March in six years, a strong April and increases for the first quarter of 2006. Many of our customers comment they came in because they saw our windows while walking past at night, so having a restaurant next door has helped us. (BTW, we have never had vomit on our sidewalk and if we did, we would call the 5 Pts Clean Team to clean it up.) In closing, I think the best avenue for all is to come together and be a part of an association with a proven track record. Working within for change always produces better results. Debbie McDaniel Revente 737 Saluda Ave. Five Points

From: -Andrew Rusnak candyman@astridhaven.com To: letters@columbiacitypaper.com Date: May 22, 2006 12:42 AM Subject: make me a columnist! I think you should make me a columnist… why?…because I’ve had enough of your shit!…and that would be the title of my column… “I’m Tired of Your Shit!” or “I Want You…to Kiss My Ass!” Here’s what you need…me…as a columnist…to counter the liberal bullshit that spews forth, dripping from cover to cover…make me your Conservative whipping boy…make me the guy that speaks the truth, yet is constantly berated with intelligentsia quips from the Columbia City Paper regulars… It would work, too…let me write a column, not only attacking the politically left, but also dumb ass PC types…I’ll tell it as I see it (as long as you publish the word “fuck” [which, by the way, I’m tired of seeing represented as, “f@!k, f&$k, and f?%k”…that’s fucking gay…get some balls…they grow on the Constitution tree})…and then you can sit around your office and gloat about how lost I am and high five each other over how much Bush has fucked up the country… in all seriousness, I really think it would be bad ass to let let me write a Conservative/loud mouth bitchfest column about dumb-ass people who do dumb fucking shit and piss me off…the things people want to say but won’t because they’re afraid of pissing off people in the community…I don’t care because I have no friends or responsibilities…so I can burn bridges that haven’t seven been built yet and not have one drop of guilt…SO MAKE ME A FUCKING COLUMNIST!! -Andrew Rusnak Dear Andrew, You are a true credit to your political affiliation, a fine specimen. You know what really grinds my gears? Conservatives that still support the Bush administration, while most have figured out the following: 1- The administration’s anticonservative policies, such as increasing spending and creating larger government. 2- Using Jesus’ name in vain, proclaiming that the savior is Bush’s role model, but Bush follows neither His acts or word in the policies of the administration. 3- The continued operation of concentration-type camps like “Gitmo.” 4- Destroying our international credibility by unilaterally invading another country based on fabricated evidence and lies to the American people. We should also reiterate he ignored a pre-9/11 memo titled “Bin Laden determined to attack inside the United States.” 5- War on the environment: Bush used regulations to undermine Clean Air Act and Clean Water Act, rejected the Kyoto Accord and expanded logging and oil drilling in national parks and monuments. 6- The continued war on everything that is American, whether it is on immigration, equal rights, or the assault on the constitution by spying on Americans. So in short, we are taking submissions for well-written (and spellchecked) columns with any viewpoint on local topics, but give up on trying to defend Bush; that’s like sending 600 troops to defend the Mexican border. Columbia City Paper P.S. We just high-fived.